Parm's Experiment

A group of computer users have ruined a psychologists thesis experiment and reduced him to a nervous wreck. The users, who inhabit a talk system called "UNaXcess", were approached to take part in a simple hypothetical behaviour study, but managed to completely ruin the experiment by picking holes in nearly every aspect of it.

Dr Ron H. Lubbard, who has devoted his life to the study of unusual social groups and the rules of interaction that govern them, was quoted as saying "I've never seen anything like it. Most other people just filled out the questionnaire. But not this lot; oh no. They started micro-analysing the whole thing - pulling it apart line by line, finding thousands of logical flaws in it, claiming the whole experiment was invalid because it failed to take into account every contingency. And then when they did agree to answer the questions anyway, they wrote ridiculous answers and started yelling abuse at each other for doing it wrong. They frequently wrote essay long answers to simple questions, wandering way off track and generally involving disgusting sexual practises and lame innuendo in nearly every sentence. Apart from this one guy, Sam, who persitently gave one-word answers which contained no useful information at all! In all my years in the field, I don't think I've ever come across anything quite so strange."

A member of the community, Julian (known in the group as Refresher) offered his opinions: "Well, if he'd thought it through properly, he wouldn't have had all these problems. I'd have gladly helped him write it, but all he did was abuse me when I pointed out the flaws in the argument, so I felt calling him a donkey-raping granny felcher was quite acceptable, in the context".

An interview with the systems administrator, Lawrence Archer, was interrupted when someone offered to buy him a beer. He did offer the following quote, however, before leaving: "Ah, they're all lovely people really. Just a bit odd, that's all. Which pub are we going to again?"

Written or otherwise spewed out by Parm